A Rare Sigthing

When was I last on here? Can somone check the time stamp for me?

What's changed?

1. Got a job as a social worker at a ADHC November 2010
2. Left the job 3weeks prior to being there a year. October 2011
3. Got a job as a social worker/therapist November 2011
4. Moved out of my parents' place 2 months ago

Where's the vocation?

Still here, going through the desert.

Paying off my loans, which have gone down from 50k to 42k. Hey, I don't make a million as a social worker. They don't pay me very well to make sure kids don't kill or hurt themselves; to help them out of depression or anxiety; or to teach parents to, well, parent; connect kids and parents to community resources.

Foot cramps are some of the most annoying things.

I'm tired as all get-out.  Friday evening into Saturday morning: sleep got worse the more that I prayed for it to come.  Saturday evening, I slept a bit better, but I still woke up 30 minutes before necessary.  I also encountered some spiritual attacks akin to September 2009.  I've since doused the room and bed in holy water, I just need to get my hands on some exorcised salt.

I learned that the blessing is gone from a Rosary if it is broken and not repaired; that it needs to be disassembled and buried.  What about when the beads on the rose petal Rosary shatter and fall off? The beads were replaced, so now what?

Bought two books on Mary today.  One is an illustrated prayer book; I am His Child, and if I need pictures to help me out, so be it.  It's terrible, trying to learn about Mary and have her be my Momma when I can scarcely figure out my own mother, how to get her to want me as me, and not as her creature.  The other is titled Mary of Nazareth, which is proving to be simply clear and informative.  No fancy words, just saying it plainly with Scripture.  Hopefully I'll find this information more human and connective.  Although there was a great book I saw in the parish bookstore a few weeks back that looks really interesting: The Life of Mary: As Seen by the Mystics. Perhaps in a few months?

Speaking with good spiritual friends recently has helped me keep my chin up.  I may be tired, sleep deprived, and not eating all three meals per day, but it will come to pass.  I spent the morning at Mass, an hour on the phone, and spent the majority of the day teaching a different class for Confirmation - they were lacking an adult leader so I got switched out.  Its neat to know that some of the difficulties I have to teaching my kids are personality differences and attitude, since the group I taught today was small, but we were all good and nice to each other.  It was different.  Not every class is like mine; that's one of many things I got out of today.

Another was the offer to spend a week in a good family home, and a good Catholic one at that.  I wish I could accept it.  I spend so much time outside of my home, just to get away that I have incurred plenty of examples of good Christian homes.  I get to know that not all parents shout and yell in arguments to the extent that you wish and wish to fly away out of the house.  I get to see people who actually show chaste affection rather than just coolness or a weird short burst of cuteness (weird - as it's out of character and only a few months per year rather than daily affection).  Perhaps one of these days.  This is one of my aims in entering therapy - wanting to learn to switch from the ways I've been taught, to the right path; otherwise I'll enter and leave religious life angry and confront people wrongly.  Subversive living is adaptive at home and it kills vocations in religious life.

How am I supposed to learn how it is to have a Mother?

Current Information of Women Religious

11-023
February 2, 2011
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
En Español

Women Entering Religious Orders Today Highly Educated, Experienced in Church Activities, Survey Finds

Newly professed class more diverse than past classes
One-quarter enter with graduate degrees
Half attended Catholic elementary school

WASHINGTON (February 2, 2011) — Women entering religious orders today are highly educated and experienced in numerous church activities, according to a national survey.

The survey report The Profession Class of 2010: Survey of Women Religious Professing Perpetual Vows was released February 2, the Church’s World Day for Consecrated Life. It was conducted by the Georgetown University-based Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate (CARA) and commissioned by the U.S. bishops’ Secretariat of Clergy, Consecrated Life and Vocations. The survey was sent to sisters represented by the two conferences of religious women, the Leadership Conference of Women Religious and the Council of Major Superiors of Women Religious, as well as contemplative communities.  Respondents represented 52 religious orders. A total of 68 out of 79 sisters contacted completed the survey.  

Major findings note:

• In general, women religious of the Class of 2010 are more diverse than previously perpetually professed women religious in terms of racial and ethnic identity. Six in ten identify as white, one in five identifies as Asian, and one in ten identifies as Hispanic/Latina.
• Nearly nine in ten sisters and nuns were born Catholic and eight in ten came from families in which both parents are Catholic. 
• Half of responding women religious (51 percent) attended a Catholic elementary school. Women religious are about as likely as other U.S. Catholics to have attended a Catholic high school and much more likely to have attended a Catholic college.
• The responding women religious are highly educated. A quarter earned a graduate degree before entering their religious institute. Six in ten entered their religious institute with at least a bachelor’s degree or more. 
• Many women religious were active in parish life before entering their religious institute. Four in ten participated in a youth group and three in ten participated in a young adult group. Eighty-five percent had ministry experience before entering their religious institute, most commonly in liturgical ministry, faith formation, or social service ministry.
• Three-quarters of responding sisters and nuns regularly participated in retreats before they entered their religious institute. Two-thirds regularly prayed the Rosary and/or participated in Eucharistic Adoration. Six in ten regularly participated in a faith sharing or Bible study group and/or in regular spiritual direction.
• Nine in ten women religious (87 percent) say they were encouraged to consider religious life by someone in their life. Of those who reported that they were encouraged to consider a vocation, more than half (52 percent) say they were encouraged by a religious sister. A third were introduced to their institute through the recommendation of a priest or advisor.
• Most women religious of the Profession Class of 2010 (84 percent) participated in some type of vocation program or experience prior to entering their religious institute. Most commonly this was a “Come and See” experience or a vocation retreat.

“We are proud of the vocation, sacred commitment and service that women religious have made in the Church,” said Archbishop Robert J. Carlson of St. Louis, chairman of the Committee for Clergy, Consecrated Life and Vocations. “Making the profession of poverty, chastity and obedience is counter-cultural. It requires courage and fidelity to remain faithful to a religious vocation.  The bishops of the United States promise their prayers and support for these and future women religious in our country.”

“The report demonstrates that family life and education are significant in forming children in the spiritual life.  Many women, before entering, were active in Church and participated in spiritual exercises — especially Eucharistic Adoration, praying the Rosary and retreats.  This is a tremendous witness to the power of Christ and prayer in the Church,” said Sister Mary Joanna Ruhland, RSM, associate director of the Secretariat. “It also points to the witness of answering God’s call that religious women and priests give to young people. The personal relationship each has with Christ is fostered by the role models they see in, and encouragement they receive from, women religious and priests.”

The entire survey can be found at:  http://www.usccb.org/cl/profession-class-2010.shtml

---
Keywords: World Day for Consecrated Life, sisters, nuns, perpetual vows, profession of vows, Archbishop Robert Carlson, Sister Mary Joanna Ruhland, CARA, Leadership Conference of Women Religious, Council for Major Superiors of Women Religious, Catholic Bishops, USCCB

New Directions

I have heard it said that you either everyone or no one.  Understandably, this comes from the presupposition that once one person is told they will then proceed to blab your confided secret to anyone else who is willing to listen.

Recently a friend retrospectively told me of how he was advised to not tell anyone of his discernment of the priesthood.  I can see why he was told that, but his family was supportive, he was grounded in what had discerned, &c.  Turn this around 180 degrees, and I could see how that would drastically backfire.  I have no family support; actually, I get the third degree every Sunday over what parish I attend for Mass.  While this is nothing new to me, and I’ve been able to carry myself pretty well over the past 4 years of discernment, I’m at a new point.

As you can see in the links at the top of the page, my vocation story says I was accepted to an order, but the explanation you are missing is that I had until June 1, 2010 to take care of my loans.  If it were just finances, maybe a little elbow grease would take care of it, but since God doesn’t function on elbow grease, but prayer and contemplation, that’s where we come to the point.  The point is, I got accepted to confirm my vocation, but I have to look at different communities/convents for my acceptance.

I can either tell everyone, or no one about my next step in this vocational process.  Aw heck, truth be told, I kept my discernment secret for the first year from everybody and it was pretty lonely.  Besides, people are curious (typically) because they care.

Time to end the hemming and hawing – I’m looking at Benedictine and Carmelite monasteries, and the Sisters of Our Lady of Mercy (from whence came St M. Faustina).  I cannot really visit any time soon since I’m more broke than Greece, but will gladly take suggestions and support.

Epic Fail by Plain-Clothed Nuns

Click on the title of the post, as it takes you straight to the site.

How to know that you should steer clear of a community:

If they post a "Former Members Reunion" on their front page.

*facepalm*

So Many Things...

Unlike a lot of bloggers, I am not fasting my blogs for Lent; it's booze. That's difficult for any post-grad person who hangs out on campus, goes to bars, clubs, etc. Yes, for any jaw-droppers out there, I party like that. There's some fun under all this straightlacing!

Sister Joseph Andrew asked me this week for an update on my discernment and about where I am with taking care of my student debt. I do not have a definitive answer for me, for you, or for her; and we all should have a response to the inquiry! I would love to know what God wants to happen.

That being said, I've got a lot of peace around the idea that I am not likely to enter the Dominican Sisters of Mary. I was heartbroken last year when I was accepted and unable to enter, but not this year. This is not resignation, this is an accepting, "Okay, God, if not the DSMME, where? Who?"

No order, as I stand right now, will seriously consider me with debt. So thus far I know that I cannot seriously apply and enter a convent for about 2 years, perhaps 3, considering I ardently desire for my sanity to move out of my parents' house.

So I've got the "when" addressed. As for the where, there are several realizations coming to me, prayerfully of course.

First, I love the DSMME, but I think I was initially drawn to their vitality, youth, and faithfulness to Rome. These are all very lovely things to desire, but a vocational calling they do not make. I liked the idea of teaching, but having used this year to teach Confirmation, I can say I like teaching, but I do not love it. I cannot do it all the time. However teaching Confirmation and being involved with 2 parishes in the area have allowed me to experience retreats. I love helping out with retreats - teaching, coordinating, being in the background, and interceding for the retreatants.

What else do I like and look for in an expression of my faith? Spiritual warfare and intercession finds me; I don't go looking for it. Now, provided some of that is directly related to the fact I live at home and family members invite idolatry and occultic practices in; yet I'm around it even outside of the family house.

Third, I'm not attached to any of the Dominican saints; they are great people and saints, but they are not the ones I call upon. I call upon St Michael, St Joan of Arc, and St Benedict. And this got me to praying and thinking about what I mentioned above in terms of spirituality and warfare, and intercession. It's always been there, it's not going away.

Lastly, at the beginning, and this continues still, my prayer has been to be with Jesus Christ alone. To just be with Him all the days of my life, and nothing else. It's the "nothing else" and "alone" that jumps out at me now. In the previous 3 years of discernment I think I was afraid of monastic and contemplative vocations. I had no idea about them, and I wasn't about to consider them out of fear. Fear? Fear is of the Devil, and it always grips us right when we are about to do something that is perfectly legitimate in the eyes of God (i.e., Confession, speaking out about the Truth). So, maybe it's time to face this old fear head on and look at monastic life, and such.

That's where I'm at.

A Quick Update

As I have mentioned in the past several posts, the DSMME put a deadline on my student loans. I have spoken with many KoC and other Catholic societies in the region and have been told not much can be started before March. March does not leave me a lot of time, so instead of buckling down and plastering this world with monetary pleas, I've been praying more.

Which leads me to say that I think God is calling me elsewhere. I'm not 100% certain, nor am I pouring the concrete until the Sisters' deadline has arrived.

In the meantime, if you could squeeze me into your prayers - for clarity - I'd really appreciate it!

Change Is In the Air

I received an email from the D. Sisters of Mary Mother of the Eucharist Sunday. It puts a demanding deadline on taking care of my student loans, one that will not be met, most likely.

I was upset for a day, now I'm so calm about the email and its implications of not entering, that it surprises even me!

So, I'm awaiting God (and my spiritual director) to provide some clarity about my other options.

I have to discern whether God is saying "yes" to my entering the DSMME, just not at this time, or God wants me elsewhere. It is that elsewhere that I'm waiting for more clarity.

~*~

I spent this past weekend at a Confirmation retreat for St James in Redondo Beach. My role there is giving me reason to pause and consider what "elsewhere" might mean.

There's Something About the Sisters of Mary

Why do you want to enter the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist?

I want to enter the SMMEs for a few reasons. The first year of my discernment from 2006 through 2007 was spent in prayer and I did not have a spiritual director at that time. I was in contact with a few different religious orders: Mission San Jose Dominicans, Daughters of Charity and School Sisters of Notre Dame. I liked different things about each one, but I soon recognized an undercurrent of apprehension: were those convents the right place? What did they think of me? Would I fit in? Why don't they practice their traditional charism? why the denuded chapels? why do they have to schedule in community time or prayer time together? why this and why that?

When I stepped foot into the SMME motherhouse that Friday evening none of those previously ever-present questions arose in my mind. I was completely focused on God and on just enjoying myself during the retreat. I felt this sense of peace within myself; I no longer had to search and question and research; no more comparison and contrast with my beliefs and practices with that of the religious community. I felt that it was over - which is why I so readily asked for papers Saturday morning before that evening's Eucharistic Adoration - I had already asked Jesus Friday night where He wanted me. He gave me the answers one after the other. The whole weekend God was saying "Yes, this is the place" in all those special ways He does in our own understanding of Scripture, prayer, music, people, etc. Lastly, as I was leaving Sunday to go home, I tried to see myself at the SMMEs just as I had tried with the MSJ Dominicans, the DCs, and SNDs; never had I pictured myself that way before, so fully.

What is it about this Community and our way of life that most appeals to you?

I'm very attracted to the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist way of life and community for reasons that echo the above. In the years since my Confirmation I have had to re-teach myself the mechanisms of the Catholic Church. I've had to learn about charisms, evangelical counsels, virtues of the flesh and theology. Few religious orders and communities actually practice a vow of obedience and poverty as I have seen in the SMMEs. There is a true sense of community: in the Eucharist and prayer life, in your daily life, and your interaction with each other. The vows and community life are faithfully lived out - sacrifice is not questioned, it's expected. I'll never forget the visit I made to convent here in Los Angeles and I was asked "Why should you have to sacrifice XYZ?" I don't have to sacrifice. I could enter a religious community that would permit me to own things - but then I'm not really, fully loving God, am I? Isn't that Who this is all about? God invites us, we say "yes," and I'm only supposed to give up what I think I can manage? No. I'm reminded of the verse in Revelations that describes what type of service and love God enjoys -- either be hot or cold, but not lukewarm. The Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist are definitely filled with Love and Passion for God and interested in doing His service and His will. Oh, and you're faithful to the Magisterium, which is important as I’ve seen it affect faith and salvation first hand in those who decide to add “New Age” or east Asian practices to the Catholic faith and liturgy; I don’t like the spiritual “funny” business.

Donations

I actually now have the means with the Laboure Society to start collecting donations toward my student loans.

If you would like to donate, and it's (a) tax-deductible, and (b) anonymous; please e-mail me at: lvngembrs@gmail.com

Oh, to be Heard by my Lord!

I am aching to put my thoughts and feelings into words for you, yet the task lingers before me. Words and sentences fail me – nothing sounds quite right. Perhaps that is fitting?

Love is blind, especially when it comes to us loving Our Lord. We hear our Souls saying stark, simple prayers, then mutter in our beings that surely the Lord will not take our Soul’s groans seriously. Perhaps He thought us just thinking and not praying and requesting that He make us broken, or impoverished, or a Fool for Him.

I knew that I was going to suffer, and that the heartbreak would be beyond anything I could imagine or prepare. I could arm myself with His Armour (Eph. 6), but as I couldn’t imagine, I couldn’t prepare myself further, except through prayer. Thus I chose a prayer:

Holy Mother, pierce me through, In my heart each wound renew Of my
Saviour crucified. Amen.

This prayer to the Five Wounds of Christ had one repeating phrase pleading Momma Mary to take my heart into her holy hands, and present it to our Lord. He was then to say it be done to me, as it was done to Him! My heart was to bear each Wound of His Blessed Flesh, from the nail piercing and bruising from the hammer blows, to the gaping tear of the thrust lance.

And I broke. What else was I to do? I could not fathom praising Him. Why would I want to praise Him for pain? Two months later, I understand that is what I should be doing because I now know with every fiber of my Being that He hears me. What am I that He should listen to me? Listen, He does. It is more than many dare ponder.

Vocation Donations

Hello Everyone!

As you may or may not know, my name is Megan Singer and I have been in discernment for the past 3 years. I was recently on retreat and accepted to the Sisters of Mary (http://www.sistersofmary.org).

The bad news is that due to my student debt I am unable to enter this August 28th as planned, but will enter Aug 28th 2010. The good news is that the Laboure Society has agreed to work with me. The Laboure Society enables me to collect donations in an anonymous and tax deductible manner.

I would love to send you more information with my vocation story. To do so, I need your NAME and ADDRESS.

Thank you so very much, & God Bless.

p.s. - if you know of anyone else who would like to help out, please pass this along.

Sincerely,

Megan Singer

lvngembrs@gmail.com

Familial Reaction to Vocation

I always knew it would be tough. I did not expect to feel like my heart had been torn out.

***

I told my mom about my discernment on Sunday afternoon around 4:25pm.

Remember that meeting I went to in Ann Arbor in November? Well I met a sister there and she recently emailed me about a retreat for the last week of June. It's for women like me who are thinking about but are uncertain of religious life.

I'm not going to waste my time, or give dignity to the things that she said to me. They were insulting, and she still looks at me with disgust and acts like I'm contaminated or contagious. There was nothing left un-insulted from my friends, the Faith, God, and myself. She insulted my judgment, my competency, my modesty, among other things.

Monday morning, my father instructed me to remove all religious items from my room: books, conservative skirts, prayer cards, Rosaries, statues, etc. There are four religious items in my room left: KJV Bible, a St Benedict medal above the doorway, a small Crucifix, and a nondescript statue of Mary. My mother stayed home from work this day because she was so upset. I was not allowed to stay home while she was there, so I spent the majority of my time in my car in parking lots. All my religious items and clothing for postulancy are in my car.

Tuesday, I went to Bible study in the evening, but everything felt like it was going through a filter. I was walking around in a spiritual haze.

Wednesday and Thursday I have been feeling better, but there are still moments.

***

My father has removed his support from me. He says that supporting me would ruin his marriage.

***

I have to purchase 3 years of health insurance for postulancy and novitate, and my father does not want anything less than full coverage. He will not let me attend the pre-postulancy retreat (6/27-7/3) unless he finds something that is satisfactory to his standards.

My mother and grandmother want me to work a year before considering religious life - if at all. My father is attempting to use this as leverage for me to buy the perfect health insurance plan for myself. However, if I were to work, as a social worker, what would remain after the government took from the paycheck, I would not have enough to afford his coveted ideal plan after several years of work.

If I do not go to pre-postulancy, my ability to enter on August is largely shot. Additionally, I need to pay off or have someone assume my $47,500 of student debt.

Drumroll Please!!

The long awaited vocation story:

I never once thought in all the time of my childhood or adolescence that I would be where I am today.  It wasn’t even really permitted – to think of religious life: poverty, chastity, and obedience in the service of God.  I cannot take credit for anything other than my “Yes” to God nearly four years ago.  It had been in private prayer to God when I came across a psalm verse that stated that God will fulfill His promise when we keep our vows.  I promised to Him then and there, before I ever became aware of the import of my prayer, that He could use me however He wanted, whenever He wanted.

While there were many people who pointed me over the past four years towards religious life, there are a few who stand out the most.  These are not the people who said “Megan, you look like a nun” or stated “You sound like a nun,” or even “God’s army needs you.”  No.  There are people who have shown me in their life, in their taking and living of religious vows what it means to see Christ in other people.  The greatest example I have personally experienced of that level of love and sacrifice can only come from a true zeal for Souls.  A friend of mine, Fr. Aaron Kuhn, was not the one to say that I looked or sounded like a nun.  He’s witnessed religious life and the suffering love that is so inherently desirable.  If there were to be one ideal, one moment that could be taken to say that encouraged and demonstrates the very nature of vocation – it is that he cared for a person and a soul that he had not met and barely knew.  As he has written recently, “These moments carry heavy opportunities to love, to suffer in humility, in magnanimity, in charity, to follow Christ as he is misunderstood, slandered, and crucified.”

I do not know where my “Yes” and my Love for God will take me; I don’t know where Christ is leading me, but I know that He has me by the hand.  I know that He’ll teach me an ever increasing Love and Zeal for Souls.  He has led me to a spiritual Home here with the Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist.  For it is here with the Sisters of Mary that I will be daily impacting Eternity through supplication, praise, and belongingness.  As Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta stated, “I belong to Jesus. He must have the right to use me without consulting me.  The very life of our vocation is belonging and being used.”  A Bride stands beside her Divine Spouse; they endure all things together.

Working towards Loans

I've been listed and started to work with the Laboure Society to pay off my student loans.  But hold your horses - not everything is fully set up just yet.

http://www.labourefoundation.org/index.html#Aspirants

Up and Coming II

+JMJ+

So you're sitting there, waiting with bated breath.

I'm trying to consolidate my loans. And then, I've got to tell you my vocation story.

Well, I sit with Jesus day in and day out. I talk to Him, sit in silence. Silence. I'm not the one who's being selectively mute right now.

Hopefully by next week I'll have more for you to go on.


In Christ, through Mary,

Megan

Up and Coming

+JMJ+

Soon I will be posting up here my vocation story and details on how to donate, to help me pay off my student loans.

It is on the 15th of May that I will graduate with my Masters in Social Work, and in order to better pay off my loans am seeking work until I have to leave to enter the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist in late August.

But don't fret, all the details about donating, dates, etc will be in the upcoming posts!

In Christ, with Mary,
Megan

Acceptance to SMMEs

March 4, 2009

Dear Megan,

We have recieved your completed official applicationof possible entrance into our community, the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist, and after study of your documents, have decided to accept you for entrance into the community! Congratulations! How such news must warm your heart - and please know that we are most grateful to God as well! Only God can give a religious vocation and thus all honor and glory and gratitude be to Him for this grace! But we also thank you for your response to His offered gift! We can imagine your joy in recieving this news!

[details about entrance date]

[signed]
In Mary, Mother of the Eucharist,
Mother Assumpta, OP

High Price for Vocation

I'm approxiamately 2 weeks away from submitting my application for entrance to the Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist. I'm waiting to set up a time with my Spiritual Director to review it and get the physical exam done as well.

After that, I can send it in.

Of course, there's a but to be expected. I know that if God can handle my salvation, He can handle $46,700 in student loans.

I know of two resources:

• the Laboure Society
• Mater Ecclesiae Fund for Vocations

But are there others? Are there certain patron Saints I could appeal to?

Excerpted from my SMME entrance application:

I want to enter the SMMEs for a few reasons. The first year of my discernment from 2006 through 2007 was spent in prayer and I did not have a spiritual director at that time. I was in contact with a few different religious orders: Mission San Jose Dominicans, Daughters of Charity and School Sisters of Notre Dame. I liked different things about each one, but I soon recognized an undercurrent of apprehension: were those convents the right place? What did they think of me? Would I fit in? Why don't they practice their traditional charism? why the denuded chapels? why do they have to schedule in community time or prayer time together? why this and why that? When I stepped foot into the SMME motherhouse that Friday evening none of those previously ever-present questions arose in my mind. I was completely focused on God and on just enjoying myself during the retreat. I felt this sense of peace within myself, that I no longer had to search and question and research; no more comparison and contrast with my beliefs and practices with that of the religious community. I felt that it was over - which is why I so readily asked for papers Saturday morning before that evening's Eucharistic Adoration - I had already asked Jesus Friday night where He wanted me. He gave me the answers one after the other. The whole weekend God was saying "Yes, this is the place" in all those special ways He does in our own understanding of Scripture, prayer, music, people, etc. Lastly, as I was leaving Sunday to go home, I tried to see myself at the SMMEs just as I had tried with the MSJ Dominicans, the DCs, and SNDs; never had pictured myself that way before, so fully.

I'm very attracted to the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist way of life and community for reasons that echo the above. In the years since my Confirmation I have had to re-teach myself the mechanisms of the Catholic Church. I've had to learn about charisms, evangelical counsels, virtues of the flesh and theology. Few religious orders and communities actually practice a vow of obedience and poverty as I have seen in the SMMEs. There is a true sense of community: in the Eucharist and prayer life, in your daily life, and your interaction with each other. The vows and community life are faithfully lived out - sacrifice is not questioned, it's expected. I'll never forget the visit I made to convent here in Los Angeles and I was asked "Why should you have to sacrifice XYZ?" I don't have to sacrifice. I could enter a religious community that would permit me to own things - but then I'm not really, fully loving God, am I? Isn't that Who this is all about? God invites us, we say "yes," and I'm only supposed to give up what I think I can manage? No. I'm reminded of the verse in Revelations that describes what type of service and love God enjoys -- either be hot or cold, but not lukewarm. The Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist are definitely filled with love and passion for God and interested in doing His service and His will. Oh, and you're faithful to the Magisterium.